Metal Breakfast Radio
 
 
Episode 43.9
Monday, June 14, 2021
“I am talking ‘ere!!”
 
This show was recorded in March (of this year, obviously) and we would very much like to give thanks to Rob Turman for the donation of beer money AND to the studio costs for Dave’s latest project, Stygian Dark. Speaking of Dave’s projects, he plays one that is over 23 years old that no one has ever heard. You can all shut your Desert Mouth, too. As for the request to keep things short, well it almost becomes the longest show ever. On this episode you can complain about:
 
Scandinavian credit cards.
Lars Ulrich, the famous Finnish plumber.
Dog-licked reading glasses.
Total Nepotism, and Pandora opens up her box. The slut.
We blame the American for previous PC-related violations.
Married With Children, starring Ted Bundy.
How many guitar WHOOOOPS did you count?
The tale of the buttery Spaniel.
Rob T: Thanks for the beer money! The song…not so much.
Dave admits he once sang like a girl. (Once??)
Bob is “don’t mention the war” years old.
 
Remember, we no longer post repeat episodes in iTunes (only new content) so follow us on Facebook for regular updates: www.facebook.com/metalbreakfastradio
 
INFO, ARCHIVE & GENERAL COCKING ABOUT: www.darksentinel.dk/mbr.html
INSTAGRAM & TWITTER: @MetalBreakfast
 
PayPal Donations gratefully accepted: Lapdog1@mac.com
 
Episode 43.8
Thursday, April 8, 2021
“Ladies and Gentlemen…”
 
While we’re not celebrating it on this episode, this show actually marks MBR’s 13th anniversary, from back on April 1st. What we ARE celebrating here is a happy-ish New Year. Indeed, this show was recorded back in 2020 and was going to be the first episode for January 2021. But schedules are currently all wibbly-wobbly, so this one is here now. Better late than never. Though you may want to listen to it before agreeing to the previous sentence. On this show you’ll be getting and regretting:
 
2020: What a bag of shite.
The Corona calibration litmus test.
We hope Sweden is okay!
Dave’s overly loud glasses.
Blasphemy and willy-waving at Jesus.
Black black blackety-black blackened of the blackest blackened black metal.
Aural haemorrhoid cream.
More cheese on your NWOBHM, vicar…or would you prefer a foursome?
Bass guitar, or a bee in a toilet roll?
Black & white TVs are actually colour.
It has come to our attention that Bob’s favourite KISS album is probably “Unmasked.”
 
Remember, we no longer post repeat episodes in iTunes (only new content) so follow us on Facebook for regular updates: www.facebook.com/metalbreakfastradio
 
INFO, ARCHIVE & GENERAL COCKING ABOUT: www.darksentinel.dk/mbr.html
INSTAGRAM & TWITTER: @MetalBreakfast
 
PayPal Donations gratefully accepted: Lapdog1@mac.com
 
Episode 43.7
Saturday, February 27, 2021
“Thanks for these virtual reality glasses…”
 
In yet another Eleventh Hour episode, Dave not only plays his pick of 2020 - and a couple from 2021 - but he also premiers a track (maybe two?) from his new project STYGIAN DARK.
And there was much rejoicing.
 
Feel free to leave any feedback on the band and the show, at all the usual places.
Or don’t. Just drink beer. That’s good too.
 
Remember, we no longer post repeat episodes in iTunes (only new content) so follow us on Facebook for regular updates: www.facebook.com/metalbreakfastradio
 
INFO, ARCHIVE & GENERAL COCKING ABOUT: www.darksentinel.dk/mbr.html
INSTAGRAM & TWITTER: @MetalBreakfast
 
PayPal Donations gratefully accepted: Lapdog1@mac.com
 
Episode 43.6
Saturday, January 23, 2021
“Holy Moley, that’s a…”
 
A special show this time around, highlighting the brand new for 2021 sampler from Transcending Obscurity Records. This is a label very close to Dave’s hearts, as several of his bands are signed to them. In fact, you can hear a track from his new project HELLFROST AND FIRE on the show - as well as another only for MBR listeners. Check out the rest of the awesome bands on the sampler, and go get it for yourself. It’s free, but throw some shekels towards the label if you can. Dave also give a 30 second tease of his other new project STYGIAN DARK at the end of the show. So stop reading this and go and listen, you bellend!
 
Remember, we no longer post repeat episodes in iTunes (only new content) so follow us on Facebook for regular updates: www.facebook.com/metalbreakfastradio
 
INFO, ARCHIVE & GENERAL COCKING ABOUT: www.darksentinel.dk/mbr.html
INSTAGRAM & TWITTER: @MetalBreakfast
 
PayPal Donations gratefully accepted: Lapdog1@mac.com
 
Episode 43.5
Saturday, December 19, 2020
“Hello children…”
 
It’s absolutely bloody amazing that we remembered how to do this. Last show we recorded together was October of 2019. Since then Dave has had two new hips, and we’re now relocated to a new location. But here you have “The Almost Xmas MBR Special” - as it’s almost Xmas, right? This is the second of two shows recorded. The first comes out in the New Year. Bleedin’ pandemic, making everything timey-wimey. On this show you’ll hear:
 
Not adamantium, but aluminium.
Vampire kiwis and poisonous koalas.
Bob admits his true feelings. But he IS smoking.
There are 2 types of music: Contrarian and Western.
Fun facts about the new Benediction album “Scriptures,” It’s great. Not just good.
Insulting and alienating both hemispheres.
Being sent money for beer by a Charles Dickens villain.
The ghost of Xmas Spenceley.
Yet more fun facts about Benediction!
Humouric or turmeric? Have you not herb?
And for the finale we even wrote a special song.
Unfortunately, Billy Joel wrote it first. The total muppet.
 
It’s the MBR-orientated version of “We Didn’t Start The Fire.” Lyrics below:
 
Started 13 years ago, Metal Breakfast Radio
Donovan and Dave and all the beers began to flow
Bob and Kent then came to quaff, after Donovan fucked off
Exterminating rubbish with the flong win-tros
 
Carlsberg, Jagerbombs, IPAs for everyone
Broadcasting rubbish all the way to Venus
Band shirts and beer guts, lovely bunch of coconuts
The only thing that’s left to rhyme is Conte’s penis
 
We didn't start the fire…etc
(Can’t post all of the chorus else Billy J will get lawyered up)
 
Rubbish in your ear canal, Doctor Who and arsenal
Using nepotism is not cheating
Nice one Einstein, four minutes is too much time
Exterminate button is overheating
Death, Thrash, and Grindcore, Panda metal such a bore
Bands that cry over their score, they always bitch and whine
Chin chin, Wizard prank, Thanks for coming, Have a wank
Buckets full of cobblers, Bring me sunshine
 
We didn't start the fire…etc
 
Canada America’s hat, Donovan came up with that
He likes domination a lot
Gin and tonic with lime, shitty music, timey-wime
It all goes south when we do shots
Oh, yeah…
Nipples, cobblers, drunken squabblers
Islands of tranquility are a no-go
Nu-Metal is rough, it can get stuffed
Black metal necros, fuck off with your bongos
 
We didn't start the fire…etc
 
Diamond Kent and Thunder Bob, our own lynch mob
They’re no mirage, with their sonic triage
Bands under their duress, points system - what a mess
No score, we hate, now we will Exterminate
Mincing words and talking bull, are we sure the fridge is full?
Holy shit, no it’s not, let’s go to the bloody shop!
 
We didn't start the fire…etc
 
It has been quite a year, luckily we’ve all had beer
Lockdown, our town, nervous breakdown
MBR back again, how long shall we remain?
We’re not sure, we can’t say, all we know that Bob is gay
Every episode a farce, we get so drunk off our arse
Belts off, trousers down, life’s a scream, we’re clowns
This track has gone on too long, sorry Billy Joel it’s flong
Now it’s time to get it snuffed, Blow it up we’ve had enough!
 
We didn't start the fire…etc etc etc.
With apologies to Mr Billy Joel.
Actually, f*** that guy. He hasn’t put out a decent album since “The Stranger.”
 
A weekly dose of Metal scrutiny, brought to you by David Ingram (Down Among The Dead Men, Ursinne & Echelon vocalist, ex-Hail Of Bullets/Bolt Thrower/Benediction), Bob Thunder (ex-Evil & Ripe) and Kent Diamond. Bands face Extermination as we critique submitted tracks while quaffing a few frosty ales. Metal, beer, and tongue-in-cheek humour.
What do you think of it so far? “RUBBISH!!”
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